The watchaholic's alternative dictionary

Noush · Post by **Noush** » Tue Apr 27, 2021 8:50 am

Oh my goodness what a thread. Spent so much time trolling, occasionally with tears of laughter rolling down my cheeks.
It's made my brain so frazzled that it's been impossible to come up with something witty enough to join the discourse!
Well done and thanks to the participants.

Post by **Amor Vincit Omnia** » Tue Apr 27, 2021 9:46 am

Noush wrote: ↑Tue Apr 27, 2021 8:50 am Spent so much time trolling,

Please don't!

Trolling - deliberately posting inflammatory material on a forum. (Keep the goats on this side of the bridge, Kirsten!)

Trawling (fig.) - close perusal of often lengthy written material, especially in search of information.

Like a trawler fishing, you see. Common error.

richtel · Post by **richtel** » Tue Apr 27, 2021 10:57 am

Oblivion - The precise location into which that minuscule click spring has launched itself while you were trying to reinstall it.

When the devil rides to work on a sleigh - The precise day and year you find that spring, most likely embedded in one's foot- click springs are spiteful like that.

Noush · Post by **Noush** » Tue Apr 27, 2021 11:39 am

Yeah Steve, poor choice of word there, I don't think in those terms I think you know

So OK, trawling indeed!

missF · Post by **missF** » Tue Apr 27, 2021 2:51 pm

Noush wrote: ↑Tue Apr 27, 2021 8:50 am Oh my goodness what a thread.

Indeed!! I have a feeling it will run and run, but I just want to high-five everyone involved so far. You’ve given me the best shared laugh, and kept me awake at nights. A brilliant experience. Thanks Rich for setting us all off and keeping the standards high.

richtel · Post by **richtel** » Tue Apr 27, 2021 6:58 pm

missF wrote: ↑Tue Apr 27, 2021 2:51 pm
Noush wrote: ↑Tue Apr 27, 2021 8:50 am Oh my goodness what a thread.
Indeed!! I have a feeling it will run and run, but I just want to high-five everyone involved so far. You’ve given me the best shared laugh, and kept me awake at nights. A brilliant experience. Thanks Rich for setting us all off and keeping the standards high.

It's been a blast hasn't it?! Thank you all for helping it along- I'm sure there are plenty more gems out there.

Wis · Post by **Wis** » Tue Apr 27, 2021 10:14 pm

Vertical clutch - pressing your stomach to ease the pain from having spent far too much on another wrist trinket.

Tortoise · Post by **Tortoise** » Wed Apr 28, 2021 2:19 am

^^^ +1. Thanks from me too - I have really enjoyed it.
Great thread Rich and wonderfull, witty contributions everyone!

Hesalite - Weight watchers crystal.

Tortoise · Post by **Tortoise** » Wed Apr 28, 2021 4:00 am

W I S W O R L D - An epic science-fiction series on foxtel depicting a dystopian future where watch addiction has reached disturbing new levels in society. In this harrowing new era, Watchaholics are lured further into addiction by being given holidays to any Watch Resort of their choosing. During their stay, they can wear watch(es) from any manufacturer they desire for the duration of their vacation. On return to normal life, their withdrawal from the rush of using high-end watches sees them often selling their possessions and resorting to crime to support their watch habit. The giant Watch Cartels, controlled by cyborg/automatons, run the watch manufacturers and battle for trading turf as well as supremacy over human-kind. The hapless Watch Addicts roam the streets like zombies looking for their next hit….

Watch Cartel - One of a number of automaton controlled organisations running the manufacture and distribution of Watches to the Users.

Pinion - King (Pin) of the Watch Cartel.

Pusher - watch seller on the street supplied by a Dealer.

Beater - Big burly dude on the corner paid by the Cartel to protect the Pushers.

Batons - Weapons used by the Beaters.

Hertz - Injuries suffered at the hands of the Beaters.

Addict / User - A watchaholic, someone who is addicted to watch use.

Minute Track - very small marks on an Addict’s arm betraying their regular watch use.

Chroming - Watch Users addicted to polishing their steel bracelets.

PVD - Vaping (Physical Vapour Deposition).

Syringe Hands - side effect sometime suffered by Users due to having their watch adjusted too tightly for too long.

Crystal Meth - white spirits for cleaning your watch face.

Coke Dial - phone call to your Dealer to score a Coke Bezel watch.

Speed - A particular type of watch supplied by Omega Dealers (aka a Speed-masters)

Coke Bezel - Expensive watches of choice favoured by the more upwardly mobile Users. Induces feelings of well-being, over confidence and euphoria.

Traser - Electric stun watch used by law enforcement.

Panda - Small British police vehicle.

Reverse Panda - Small British getaway vehicle.

Silver Panda - Small British police vehicle ageing gracefully.

watchaholic · Post by **watchaholic** » Wed Apr 28, 2021 6:34 am

Are syringe hands even capable of a coke dial???

richtel · Post by **richtel** » Wed Apr 28, 2021 3:44 pm

Fat bars - A cruel referral to chocolate confectionery.

Mis-placed marker - A dry-erase pen in the boardroom that actually works.

Hand Stack - Cheesy teambuilding foofoo popular in sports now deemed unacceptable in the socially-distanced workplace.

Sub Hands - Derogatory reference to ex-presidential Orange Monsters

magicman · Post by **magicman** » Wed Apr 28, 2021 5:56 pm

Tortoise wrote: ↑Wed Apr 28, 2021 4:00 am W I S W O R L D - An epic science-fiction series on foxtel depicting a dystopian future where watch addiction has reached disturbing new levels in society. In this harrowing new era, Watchaholics are lured further into addiction by being given holidays to any Watch Resort of their choosing. During their stay, they can wear watch(es) from any manufacturer they desire for the duration of their vacation. On return to normal life, their withdrawal from the rush of using high-end watches sees them often selling their possessions and resorting to crime to support their watch habit. The giant Watch Cartels, controlled by cyborg/automatons, run the watch manufacturers and battle for trading turf as well as supremacy over human-kind. The hapless Watch Addicts roam the streets like zombies looking for their next hit….

Watch Cartel - One of a number of automaton controlled organisations running the manufacture and distribution of Watches to the Users.

Pinion - King (Pin) of the Watch Cartel.

Pusher - watch seller on the street supplied by a Dealer.

Beater - Big burly dude on the corner paid by the Cartel to protect the Pushers.

Batons - Weapons used by the Beaters.

Hertz - Injuries suffered at the hands of the Beaters.

Addict / User - A watchaholic, someone who is addicted to watch use.

Minute Track - very small marks on an Addict’s arm betraying their regular watch use.

Chroming - Watch Users addicted to polishing their steel bracelets.

PVD - Vaping (Physical Vapour Deposition).

Syringe Hands - side effect sometime suffered by Users due to having their watch adjusted too tightly for too long.

Crystal Meth - white spirits for cleaning your watch face.

Coke Dial - phone call to your Dealer to score a Coke Bezel watch.

Speed - A particular type of watch supplied by Omega Dealers (aka a Speed-masters)

Coke Bezel - Expensive watches of choice favoured by the more upwardly mobile Users. Induces feelings of well-being, over confidence and euphoria.

Traser - Electric stun watch used by law enforcement.

Panda - Small British police vehicle.

Reverse Panda - Small British getaway vehicle.

Silver Panda - Small British police vehicle ageing gracefully.

Fantastic work, just when I thought this thread slowing down.

Regards Steve

missF · Post by **missF** » Wed Apr 28, 2021 9:22 pm

Brilliant tortoise!

jkbarnes · Post by **jkbarnes** » Wed Apr 28, 2021 9:41 pm

Choreochronography: noun, the hand/eye coordination necessary to pull off a masterful wrist shot showing off ones watch at it’s finest.

Example:
Did you see @MiniMpi’s latest CWOTD post? His choreochronography skills are off the charts!

jkbarnes · Post by **jkbarnes** » Wed Apr 28, 2021 10:00 pm

TranSUBstantiation: noun, in watch collecting circles, the doctrine holding that ones life, and by extension the enjoyment of that life, is transformed in substance by the addition of a Rolex, although to the non-collector things appear to be unchanged.

Example:
My wife’s doubt of tranSUBstantiation led her to present me with an ultimatum - the Rolex or the marriage. I’ll miss her.

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